If sleep is for the weak, then I must be the strongest person I know. A recent bout with insomnia has had me awake in the middle of the night, usually for at least an hour at a time. Like many insomniacs, my mind races with a variety of thoughts and ideas. I offer for you just a few of those thoughts from the past few nights:
• I awaken realizing I have a column due this week and have no real solid idea what I should write about. I bet if I lie awake long enough, something will come to me.
• It’s almost fall and that means my wife will soon be using our gas fireplace we had installed a year ago. Would 3 a.m. be a good time to check the batteries in the fireplace remote, as well as try to figure out how to utilize the light in the unit without turning on the flame?
• Since reading can often help one fall asleep, and I have three books I want to tackle, should I re-read the book about the 9-11 hijackers, or start the book about the underground railroad or the book about how to write a song?
• If I read the book about songwriting, should I try to hum a melody softly enough to myself that won’t wake up my wife and actually help me get to sleep?
• To this day, I still don’t understand hashtags and how to use them or why one would want to use them.
• The clock on our mantle chimed to let me know it’s 3 a.m. and I remember I didn’t wind the clock yet for the week. I’d better get up to do that.
• While I’m up winding the clock, I see some paperwork my wife needs to fill out to substitute teach in a neighboring school district. She hasn’t filled it out yet and I wonder if I should wake her to remind her to do that in the morning.
• I resist the urge to wake my wife with the paperwork responsibilities, instead checking the timer on some decorative lighting on our mantle to see if I can figure out how to turn the lights on and off. I am successful at this, so take a few minutes to admire the lighting.
• I decide that the next book I tackle will be the book about the underground railroad. But instead of starting it right away, I make a note to remind myself to begin reading it. I also make a note to remind my wife to fill out her paperwork.
• I have an upcoming golf date with a good friend. The two of us have been trying to get together to golf for a couple of years. But my game has been bad lately and I make a mental note to get to a range and hit some balls before we play. Then I start thinking about my grip, my stance and what hat I should wear the day we play.
Each night I awaken, I am finally able to get back to sleep. But each morning, I have the same two lingering questions.
What am I going to write for my column and what the heck is a hashtag?